


i want you to hear my voice

by dons



Series: waiting for you [2]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: (mention) - Freeform, Angst, Arson, Character Death, Cuddling & Snuggling, Dead Taeyong, Domestic, Established Relationship, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Ghost Taeyong, Ghosts, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Kissing, M/M, Memories, Moving On, Pet Names, not actually very angsty at all !! trust me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-10
Updated: 2019-03-10
Packaged: 2019-11-14 19:21:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18058517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dons/pseuds/dons
Summary: This is an automated message.Hello, LEE TAE YONG. Welcome to the Waiting Room Introduction v1.13.2. Thank you for giving us your treasured time and attention.Please confirm your cause of death.DEATH from TERRORIST OFFENCE (selected: ARSON)CONFIRM [x]   DENY [ ]You have been selected for DECISIONAL SCREENING due to the following reason(s):> Five or more years spent with SOULMATEPlease confirm your SOULMATE.KIM DONG YOUNG (selected: KIM DONG YOUNG)CONFIRM [x]   DENY [ ]-taeyong, dead, follows his soulmate kim dongyoung around as a ghost.





	i want you to hear my voice

**Author's Note:**

> hi everyone !! here is the finalized ending for my other fic habits !! there were a few diff endings i had entertained but ultimately, i believe this is the best one. please enjoy!

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day one

 

taeyong is thrown into consciousness and he’s standing in the kitchen of their house. his eyes are blurry but as he closes and reopens them, the fogginess lessens and is replaced by the clear view of their calendar on the refrigerator.

 

it’s been about a month since the fire. taeyong had been waiting in queue for the afterlife application for a month.

 

being a ghost is nothing like he imagined. rather than being able to float through walls like he would have thought, he instead reaches a hand out and touches the rough paper of the calendar. it feels like cheap plastic between his cold fingertips.

 

taeyong flips a page. he can move things- and feel things, but everything is slightly different from when he was alive. everything feels fake.

 

to his right is the clock. at three in the morning, the house is dark. taeyong walks around the kitchen island and runs his fingers down the feeling of the smooth marble.

 

he remembers feeling the island for the first time, when he had marvelled at the luxury he would have never thought he could afford before.

 

taeyong leaves the kitchen and walks into the open corridor. up the stairs, there is a single dim light- he knows dongyoung likes leaving a small LED lamp on at night, warm yellow and easy on the eyes lest he want a drink.

 

he walks up the stairs. there is no familiar creak on the third step like there normally is.

 

their bedroom door is completely open- something dongyoung would like but taeyong wouldn’t. in this taeyong is thankful because he’s able to walk in without a sound, and there dongyoung is, sleeping on top of the blankets with his hair too long and his eyebrows furrowed.

 

if taeyong had not been a ghost, he would have never known dongyoung would talk in his sleep.

 

“flow’r,” dongyoung mumbles.

 

taeyong presses the back of his hand to dongyoung’s cheeks and feels warmth but no smooth softness of skin. “dongyoungie,” he says, but though he can hear his own voice dongyoung does no more than breathe deeply.

 

taeyong sits on the loveseat in the corner all night and stares at dongyoung toss and turn in his sleep, murmuring his name.

 

day two

 

taeyong realizes that he’s able to sleep. he doesn’t have dreams. instead, he’s faced with the ugly, glowing neon words that are the “afterlife menu options”.

 

there’s no way to say he expected a full working team of afterlife management like a forever 21 store. he can choose to wake up and choose to sleep.

 

there’s not much to do, though.

 

other than that, taeyong realizes a few more things. in dongyoung’s presence, he can touch and feel but not move- as long as it is in dongyoung’s sight, he’s basically a ghost that can feel everything yet nothing can feel him.

 

when dongyoung is in the kitchen staring at the pantry, taeyong tries grabbing a loaf. instead the plastic wrapping of the bread feels like carved stone, and taeyong feels his grip slipping.

 

not many things change in the house, anyways. there are three tote bags on the bedroom doorknob.

 

day five

 

today, taeyong explores the house a little bit more.

 

dongyoung is on the couch, lying straight with his earbuds in and his eyes open, staring at the ceiling. taeyong walks by him and sometimes leans down to kiss his lips. it is similar to kissing a statue.

 

he realizes that dongyoung has begun decorating the house with many more flowers than he remembers. there are red and yellow ones in the living room, blue and purple ones in every guest room, and bouquets of all colours around their once-shared bedroom.

 

that night, dongyoung sits on the bed and cries. he curls up under the blankets and taeyong wishes he could lift them up to press a soft kiss to his forehead but he can only grasp meaninglessly at the sheets and listen to dongyoung sob and sob and taeyong cries too.

 

day ten

 

dongyoung finally leaves the house to buy groceries.

 

this is also the day where taeyong learns he can’t leave the house. he can make it as far as their large front yard before his knees suddenly feel weak and his legs freeze up on spot.

 

so he walks back into the house and stays there, and dongyoung comes home in half an hour, with four bags of groceries in one hand and his overcoat in the other.

 

day thirteen

 

they have a photobook. something like a scrapbook, too. dongyoung looks through it for the first time since taeyong’s been following him around.

 

in it, taeyong sees the new and old memories. he reaches a hand out to pause on one of his favourite pages- the one of their engagement date, but dongyoung closes the book too fast and the pages float through taeyong’s fingers.

 

taeyong realizes this is because dongyoung doesn’t want to stain the scrapbook. he cries carefully, head heaving over the hardwood of their floor as he lets them fall. taeyong tries catching them with his hands but again, it is as if he is simply the cold night wind, visiting.

 

later, when dongyoung is in the kitchen for water, taeyong takes the scrapbook out. he flips to a page- of them in the farmer’s market, taeyong holding two carrots in each hand and smiling with such life. he lets his tears fall, too, but they leave no marks.

 

he puts the book back before dongyoung returns and this time, sleeps right where dongyoung has left a gap on the bed.

 

day twenty one

 

surprisingly, dongyoung still does work. he slaves away on taeyong’s keyboard and his own mixer with his headphones on. taeyong supposes that every other time he has, taeyong has been in another room of the house.

 

dongyoung cries almost every day. taeyong hates it so, so much. dongyoung slams his forehead on the keyboard and there’s a disgusting chord of notes that sound dysfunctional and disgusting and dongyoung cries tearlessly. he is loud and he is hiccuping.

 

“i miss you,” he whispers between his gasps for breath and cries of sorrow.

 

all night, taeyong screams at him too. he says _i miss you_ and _i love you_ with every bit of power he has, but dongyoung lives deaf.

 

day thirty

 

dongyoung cleans up the long dead flowers in some places of the house. he leaves for an hour or two and comes back with new ones in hand, of bright warm colours and cool tones, and he cleans up the vases.

 

taeyong watches everything he does, staring at the diamond ring on his finger and the lack of his own on his finger. he sees it on his nightstand, clear of dust and desperately, he grabs at it but it only falls through his transparent fingers whenever dongyoung is there.

 

“you have weird taste,” taeyong says when he sees dongyoung mixing oranges and purples together.

 

again. it was something taeyong had fallen in love with. he’s still in love with everything dongyoung does, he’s still in love with the husk of what dongyoung was and the husks of what dongyoung used to do. he’s still in love with the sound of his own keyboard being played by dongyoung’s stiff fingers.

 

he thinks he falls more and more in love every single day when he notices dongyoung’s lack of it. he wants to give to dongyoung, give and give and take nothing but one single _i love you_ from dongyoung’s own lips.

 

when taeyong offers his heart, dongyoung gets up and walks right through him. taeyong no longer wants to feel anything but the warmth of dongyoung’s body.

 

day thirty two

 

“even if i die, i can’t let you go,” dongyoung whispers in his sleep.

 

taeyong slams his forehead on the bathroom counter and almost feels blood, but there is not a single mark of sweat on his forehead. he feels no pain but only a dull throbbing, so he throws his head on the counter again and again until he can finally feel something else. he throws up invisible water into the toilet. he feels it building up in his throat, and when he lurches over the bowl, there is nothing that comes out except a soft breath, and taeyong is disgusted to his guts by it.

 

day forty five

 

for once, the doorbell rings, and when dongyoung opens the door, there’s a brown box covered in ugly yellow halloween tape. taeyong stands a few meters away when dongyoung talks to the delivery man.

 

“i didn’t order anything,” dongyoung says. though taeyong only sees the back of his head, he knows dongyoung is frowning.

 

“sorry,” the delivery man says- he’s more of a boy really, looking not a day older than nineteen. “but that’s your address, and i know i didn’t read it wrong. but sorry! uh, yeah. sorry.”

 

“it’s- fine,” dongyoung says. “stop apologizing, dude.”

 

“sorry,” the boy says, then curses in mandarin under his breath. “i’ll- bye sir! go, i’ll go.” he dashes down the steps and trips on a rock.

 

dongyoung closes the door and drags the package in, staring at it like he’s shooting lasers before dropping it on the island and shuffling away to the bathroom. taeyong looks at the package, with no names and just one address, and decides to follow dongyoung.

 

day fifty six

 

it hurts. it hurts taeyong, in whatever form he takes, to see dongyoung in the state he is in. he hates how dongyoung doesn’t try to hold his tears in.

 

“dongyoungie,” taeyong coos, when he’s standing right in front of dongyoung. he has his arms wrapped around dongyoung’s neck but dongyoung stares directly outside the window. taeyong can’t feel the wind against his back.

 

“i love you so much, dongyoung,” taeyong says. he knows dongyoung only sees the trees and the stars but taeyong pretends that dongyoung says it back and that he is there, in real life, holding dongyoung close.

 

taeyong grips onto the back of dongyoung’s shirt but even the soft fabric feels like nothing in his hands. “i would do anything for you to be happy,” taeyong says. he leans back and looks at dongyoung’s eyes, which are gray in the darkness of the room. dongyoung barely bothers to turn a light on.

 

there is not much more for taeyong to do. he sings billy joel again, while he smiles and stares at dongyoung. he loves the man in his non-existent arms.

 

day sixty eight

 

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day sixty nine

 

eleven o'clock at night, the doorbell rings. dongyoung in his night majesty resembles something like a mean bat witch.

 

taeyong himself is sitting on top of the fridge, staring as dongyoung opens the door and throws it to the side.

 

standing outside is a man around their age. he looks new- taeyong in his time had never seen him around the neighbourhood.

 

“what the hell do you want, dude?” dongyoung asks. he’s angry, but taeyong knows that he’s just truly tired. he almost feels bad for the man outside, but taeyong looks down and focuses on swinging his legs gently against the fridge door.

 

“uhh,” the man says.

 

dongyoung leans against the doorframe.

 

“sorry.” the man clears his throat. “i think i sent a package to the wrong address.”

 

taeyong then looks at the box on the island. he swears- when dongyoung had received it, no name was written, but now there is a large sticker on it, stating NAKAMOTO YUTA as the sender with no recipient.

 

“holy shit,” dongyoung whines, rubbing his face. “you’re here at midnight because you sent me a fucking package that wasn’t mine.”

 

“yeah, sorry ‘bout that man,” yuta says, one hand scratching the back of his neck. “i was moving into a new house but i’m pretty sure i got the entire street name wrong and now i’m here. that package was for a friend of mine who lives in that neighbourhood- it’s an hour away, but i came here to get the package and to apologize, but i never really-”

 

“can you actually shut up, please,” dongyoung says, banging his fist on his forehead.

 

“right,” yuta says, and swallows. “i’m yuta, uh, nakamoto. nakamoto yuta. and that’s my package.”

 

“it’s too late at night for this, i swear,” dongyoung responds. “come in and sleep on the goddamn couch. leave in the morning. i’m going back to bed.”

 

yuta raises an eyebrow but steps in and shuffles around with his shoes. “i parked my car outside. you’re really letting a stranger in? for a package? not really the smartest decision, don’t you think?”

 

“goodnight, namatoko,” and dongyoung slams the door shut, locks it, and goes to bed.

 

day seventy

 

taeyong sits around and learns a lot about yuta.

 

“you’re living all the way there?” dongyoung asks, after he’s had tea in the morning and is looking a lot better.

 

yuta turns out to be just as loud in the mornings. “yeah! it’s a far drive from your place exactly but i’m pretty sure we share some community amenities and stuff. you’ve got a nice place, by the way. lots of flowers.”

 

taeyong himself feels out of place, suddenly, like he’s listening to a conversation he shouldn’t be hearing.

 

“they’re to remember an ex,” dongyoung says.

 

taeyong can’t stand it. he leaves and enters the bedroom and throws himself into the covers. even with his hands over his ears he hears dongyoung’s crying and yuta’s hushed whispers of condolences.

 

day seventy six

 

something has happened in the time that taeyong has been ignoring dongyoung, that much is apparent.

 

dongyoung looks a bit happier, like he’s had a little bit more sleep. his eyes are bright and when he takes the clothes out of the dryer (the door opens right past taeyong’s legs, which are dangling from where he’s sitting on top of the machine) he rolls them up and sets them in the drawers.

 

he checks his phone more. from behind his shoulder, taeyong sees that he’s texting nakamoto yuta. taeyong feels happy but sick in the stomach, and he wonders if he can handle it. handle this.

 

dongyoung moves on surprisingly fast. taeyong isn’t sure if this is because of him or because of dongyoung.

 

day seventy seven

 

maybe taeyong is weird for staring.

 

yuta pulls up in front of the house with a pretty bouquet of flowers and when dongyoung opens the door, yuta kisses him square on the lips, flowers a little bit squished between their chests. dongyoung kisses back and taeyong tries not to look when dongyoung slips into his shoes and leaves, locking the door carefully.

 

the house can be lonelier but also more peaceful when it’s only taeyong, dead taeyong and his dead things to do. he looks at the flowers and looks at the little scrapbook, a little bit forgotten in the little corner of the little house. and taeyong himself feels little and small and small.

 

day seventy nine

 

“i don’t think i should,” dongyoung says to himself.

 

dongyoung talks to himself more than taeyong ever remembers now. it’s the loneliness, but taeyong wants dongyoung to know he isn’t really alone.

 

“what are you talking about?”

 

“am i falling in love again?” dongyoung says. he’s sitting against the wall with his knees to his chest and taeyong is right beside him, head on his shoulder. “i don’t want to be. i don’t like this feeling.”

 

“i’m sorry, it’s my fault baby,” taeyong says, and he kisses him gently on the temple.

 

dongyoung seems to keep his thoughts to himself. his lips move a little bit and he murmurs out little bits and pieces of whatever may be going through his mind. outside, it is raining, and there is a gentle rhythm of tapping on the windows. dongyoung seems to fall asleep to the sound, posture falling as his head rolls back and forth.

 

taeyong runs his thumb over dongyoung’s lips.

 

day eighty four

 

dongyoung comes home from his date smiling so widely and taeyong hasn’t seen him this joyful in so, so long. he is dragging yuta by his hands and they kiss wildly as dongyoung struggles to lock the door behind them.

 

“c’mere, oh god, yuta,” dongyoung groans, and yuta giggles as he bites at dongyoung’s lips and then moves down to bite at his neck, hands gripping his wrists. they are a mess but taeyong watches, because he’s trapped in this house that he locked himself into.

 

taeyong knows they aren’t drunk, because dongyoung doesn’t ever drink and it was yuta driving his car, but they act like they’re teenagers again when dongyoung stumbles backwards and yuta kisses him again with so much force.

 

“b’droom,” dongyoung mumbles, and yuta nods. they separate only for a little bit to properly make their way into the bedroom, and taeyong follows them. he sees just the door to his bedroom slam shut before the sounds of laughter and moaning is filling the empty hallway.

 

taeyong stands there. he looks down and where there should be a shadow, is only the brown hardwood flooring he had loved so much.

 

back in the living room are dongyoung’s abandoned earbuds and phone. taeyong slots them into his own ears and chooses from dongyoung’s playlists. there is still the one he had made for him, so many years ago, when they had just begun dating. so he plays it and turns the volume up, and eventually he falls asleep.

 

day eighty six

 

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day eighty nine

 

“taeyong,” dongyoung says in the afternoon, just back from a morning at a cafe.

 

taeyong at first thinks it’s dongyoung whispering some sweet nothings again. maybe with his eyes closed, sweet memories gathering in his mind.

 

“taeyong, you can hear me, right? you’re there?”

 

this is not a dream. taeyong jolts up and he turns around so fast from where he’s seated on the couch- dongyoung is gazing around the room warily but with a small smile on his face.

 

“what the fuck?” taeyong says.

 

nothing is changed. dongyoung clearly can’t hear him- but dongyoung somehow knows he’s there.

 

“yuta told me some things.” dongyoung slides his bag off his shoulder and rests it gently against the wall. “a few nights ago. you’re there, baby, aren’t you? right?”

 

taeyong can hear that dongyoung still questions himself. “i’m right here baby,” taeyong cries.

 

dongyoung is a beautiful man when he’s grinning. “yuta’s had a soulmate before, you know.”

 

day ninety

 

quote

 

_he’s had a soulmate. somebody i don’t know- but he told me so much this morning. and the nights before. taeyongie, i know you’re there._

 

_yuta told me that one day, he had a dream. he had a dream of his loverboy telling him that he was there, watching over him. that’s the wish he used. i don’t know what they’re called, or what you call them. but i know you’re there! my baby, i can’t believe i can talk to you and you can hear me and i don’t care if i’m crazy or if i believe yuta too much or if you’ve chosen something else._

 

_i believe in you so much, baby. i know you’re here to watch over me. i love you so goddamn much._

 

_i’m going to need some time but i hope you can see me and feel me and i’ll try to talk to you as much as i can. baby, you’re really there, aren’t you? i love you. i miss you. flower, my flower. everything is for you, flower._

 

unquote

 

taeyong is crying again but he’s smiling so wide because dongyoung is too when he goes to bed, and he and dongyoung whisper countless _i love you’s_ over and over again in the early, early morning.

 

day ninety one

 

“there’s a lot this means now, you know,” dongyoung mentions to taeyong.

 

taeyong whistles in agreement.

 

“there’s something at the back of my mind,” dongyoung says again. “it’s just an itch, but i was thinking about it a lot yesterday. i wonder if you’ll like it.”

 

to this, taeyong squints his eyes and his nose scrunches up. “what do you mean?”

 

“just an itch,” dongyoung says without any serious thought. “i hope you’ll be okay with it.”

 

“do you love yuta?” taeyong asks.

 

“i miss you a lot, flower,” dongyoung replies. but that’s not what taeyong wants to hear.

 

day ninety two

 

_i don't want clever conversation_

_i never want to work that hard_

_i just want someone that I can talk to_

_i want you just the way you are_

 

day ninety three

 

“do you know how much i miss you, flower?” dongyoung asks, when he’s sitting at taeyong’s keyboard.

 

“i think i do,” taeyong says. “but let me know. i want to know.”

 

dongyoung presses a note. he presses two more and there’s a major chord. “i dream of you every night now. is it you or me?”

 

“i don’t think it’s me,” taeyong says.

 

again, dongyoung misaligns when he presses down on the keys. it is first the G, then the E, then both C’s at once. “i can’t live without you, baby,” he sighs, “i don’t know how i have been. it’s so hard. do you know?”

 

“i know,” taeyong responds.

 

dongyoung laughs at himself like he’s embarrassed- but taeyong has been ripping his lungs out every day to say so many words that dongyoung will never hear. “i don’t know why i ask you so many questions. you can’t respond and i can’t hear you.”

 

“i can, baby,” taeyong pleads. “ask me more. say anything. i want to hear your voice.”

 

dongyoung smiles at the wall warmly and sings, instead.

 

day ninety four

 

yuta comes over this day.

 

“hi,” dongyoung says, and he smiles.

 

yuta’s nose crinkles up but he laughs. “hey.”

 

“i feel kind of crazy, talking to taeyong,” dongyoung admits to yuta. he looks around but doesn’t look anywhere where taeyong is- standing right beside him, desperately wanting to catch him on the lips.

 

“that’s how i feel too, sometimes,” yuta replies. dongyoung smiles at him again.

 

“you remember what i was talking about last time we were out?”

 

“yeah,” yuta says, breath hitching. “are you really sure?”

 

dongyoung kicks at the floor. “a hundred percent. i’m sorry, yuta, but thank you.”

 

taeyong wants to know what’s happening. he hopes it isn’t what he thinks it is- but it’s always what he thinks it is, because he knows dongyoung and because he knows how dongyoung’s mind works. for now, he is okay with staring as dongyoung and yuta sit down on the couch and talk to each other like they have known each other for years and years.

 

taeyong himself sits alone in the kitchen. even when dongyoung calls his name, he just retreats to the bedroom where he sits and looks out the window.

 

day ninety five

 

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_OTHER_

 

_Opening the CONTACT US menu. Please hold._

 

_…_

 

_Welcome to the CONTACT US menu. What is your desired form of communication?_

 

**_LIVE TEXT_ **

_LIVE CALL_

 

_Now connecting to a LIVE TEXT server. Please hold._

 

_…_

 

_Welcome to the LIVE TEXT server. Your assistant today is MOON TAE IL._

 

_ > hello taeyong! my name is taeil. what do you need today? _

_i’m just having some doubts about this thing < _

_ > i see. i understand that haunting can be difficult. _

_yea. i redeemed a credit < _

_idk if i should have or if i did < _

_the right thing < _

_ > what was your credit redemption for? _

_i just wanted him 2 move on from me < _

_but somehow he knows i’m here now and he talks 2 me < _

_he met someone else whose soulmate asked for him to realize his presence < _

_ > oh. _

_ > that’s interesting. i don’t see situations like these very often. _

_really? do you know what will happen? < _

_ > not all couples turn out to be soulmates, and not everyone has a soulmate anyways. consider yourself lucky. _

_idk i just < _

_i wish i didn’t have to see this you know < _

_can u find out? if we are soulmates then < _

_what’s going on with this other guy < _

_do you get me < _

_ > i understand. i’ll contact management and ask them. if you ever come back, i’ll be here with your information. _

_thank you < _

 

_Would you like to exit your LIVE TEXT server?_

_CONFIRM [x]   DENY [ ]_

 

_Now exiting LIVE TEXT server. Please hold._

 

_…_

 

_Thank you for your patience. In a few moments, you will be sent back to LOCATION: OVERWORLD (lock: KIM DONG YOUNG) through our recently updated transportation experience. Please wait one minute._

 

_How was your experience with LIVE TEXT today?_

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_We are now transporting you back to LOCATION: OVERWORLD (lock: KIM DONG YOUNG). Please hold._

 

day ninety six

 

“good morning, beautiful,” dongyoung says to the air. taeyong is standing a few meters away but he knows that although dongyoung’s eyes are lost, he means all well and means the same thing as he always does.

 

taeyong walks up to him and holds his hand. “you look handsome,” he says. today is romantic. he doesn’t know why.

 

“listen, flower, a lot has been on my mind recently.” dongyoung had recently gotten another haircut, and he’s looking a lot younger now. he runs a hand through his hair and it falls back into place.  “i want to be with you.”

 

“you are,” taeyong replies. “i’m right here, with you.”

 

“that’s why i’m doing what i’m doing, okay?” dongyoung says. “because i love you.”

 

and taeyong realizes that when dongyoung means something, he means it in the most pure sense possible. an unsettling shiver goes down his spine.

 

day ninety seven

 

taeyong wants to forget the ordeal. he is good at pretending he is still alive, so he’ll pretend that dongyoung had been saying nonsense yesterday. dongyoung will acknowledge taeyong’s presence and live a nice life with yuta. taeyong can watch over him and make sure he doesn’t get sick.

 

dongyoung isn’t supposed to know he’s here. taeyong realizes this too late and realizes where he’s made a mistake.

 

but tomorrow, taeyong will pretend to forget. and he will believe it.

 

day ninety eight

 

dongyoung is frying eggs.

 

taeyong walks behind him and wraps his arms around dongyoung’s stomach, nuzzling his nose into the side of his neck. “good morning, doie,” he says.

 

dongyoung hums a little tune. when he’s finished, he slides it into a plate and eats it while sitting on the kitchen island. beside him, taeyong sits and wraps his arms around dongyoung’s neck.

 

“taeyongie!” dongyoung calls. “i hope you can hear me. where are you? are you here?”

 

“i’m right here,” taeyong says into dongyoung’s ear, but dongyoung continues to shout.

 

“i’m going to yuta’s today, and i’ll be back tomorrow night.”

 

taeyong looks at the side of dongyoung’s face. he sits himself back a little bit and stares at dongyoung, chewing on his egg. he presses a small kiss to his cheek.

 

dongyoung finishes relatively quickly. “i know you’ll be bored, but i left everything out in the open. you can turn the television on if you want, or do anything else.”

 

but taeyong has no interest in the shows that play when dongyoung is not there to coax him through the boredom. when dongyoung wears taeyong’s favourite coat- the one that makes his shoulders look more square than they really are- and leaves the house, taeyong sits in silence.

 

he turns the television on eventually- for white noise in the background. he opens the windows and lets in the morning light, opens a few to have a nice breeze blowing, reorganizes some of the flowers.

 

when he walks into the bedroom, the bed is already made. taeyong sees the old photobook on his old nightstand, and decides to start there.

 

day ninety nine

 

“flower, i’m home,” dongyoung says as he closes the door behind him. “i wonder where you are.” taeyong had been cleaning the house when dongyoung walks right past him and into the bedroom.

 

taeyong follows him and looks at dongyoung as he sits down on the bed and rearranges the bouquet of flowers on his nightstand table.

 

“i ended things with yuta, but i think you knew that’d happen.” dongyoung looks sad when he smiles, and there’s no small crinkle in the corners of his eyes when he does so. taeyong brings his thumb up to run it across dongyoung’s cheek.

 

“taeyong.” dongyoung doesn’t know where to look. “flower. i love you so much.”

 

“i love you too,” taeyong responds.

 

“you have to forgive me, okay?”

 

and taeyong can’t say anything when he sees dongyoung’s eyes.

 

day one hundred

 

taeyong, sitting on the couch opposite to dongyoung, stares him right in the eyes. he wonders what dongyoung would be seeing- just the empty couch and the blank wall, yet dongyoung stares at the empty space with so much emotion in his eyes.

 

“you don’t have to,” taeyong says. “please don’t. not for me.”

 

dongyoung stares at taeyong and he smiles. if taeyong were alive, maybe he would be able to feel the warmth in dongyoung’s smile, but taeyong can only feel his own cold tears drying and creating a scraggly path of despair down his cheeks. they freeze on his face like frost on a window. they fall into the corners of his mouth and he tastes the saltiness trickling down into his throat.

 

taeyong reaches over and places his hands on dongyoung’s. “i made a wish,” taeyong says, and he hiccups while he talks but his voice isn’t strong enough to properly beg, to sob in front of dongyoung’s blank stare and loving smile. “i made a fucking wish. don’t do it. please.”

 

dongyoung looks down at his hands as if he can feel taeyong’s presence, pleading with him.

 

“flower, i know you can hear me,” dongyoung begins, and taeyong screams at him. he shouts every possible thing he can and grabs dongyoung’s head and tries to shake it. but his presence itself is silent.

 

dongyoung hums a billy joel song and taeyong slaps his face, over and over again. “i know i’ll have to wait, baby.”

 

taeyong doesn’t want to imagine it. while dongyoung is in an unimaginable neverending line of dead lovers, waiting for an application to reach somewhere that isn’t the disgusting white box, taeyong will remain in the overworld, staring at dongyoung’s corpse.

 

“but i’m doing this for you.” taeyong looks up and dongyoung is no longer staring at him in the eys. he’s looking past his gaze and right to the spot where he was. “i want to be with you so, so much, angel.” and dongyoung keeps his tight smile on his face. “i wonder if you’re why i met yuta. thank you, baby. he’s helped me a lot.”

 

taeyong cries and howls into dongyoung’s chest.

 

“promise me you’ll wait for me, though,” dongyoung whispers.

 

at that moment, taeyong feels his whole body freeze up. he feels his veins circulating with no blood in them, he feels his heart being beaten and kicked as he looks at dongyoung’s beautiful face. dongyoung, who he was supposed to marry, wears his engagement ring on his left ring finger. dongyoung, who was his highschool sweetheart, looks more beautiful than ever with his tangled hair and his small hiccups of breath. dongyoung, who was his soulmate, still is and always will be.

 

“i’ll wait for you forever,” taeyong promises him, and when dongyoung gets up and grabs his keys, taeyong is left to curl up on the little bit of warmth left on the couch.

 

 

 

_This is an automated message._

 

_Hello, KIM DONG YOUNG. Welcome to the Waiting Room Introduction v1.13.4. Thank you for giving us your treasured time and attention._

 

_Please confirm your cause of death._

**_DEATH from SUICIDE (selected: FALL IMPACT)_ **

 

_CONFIRM [x]   DENY [ ]_

 

_You have been selected for DECISIONAL SCREENING due to the following reason(s):_

_ > Five or more years spent with SOULMATE _

 

_Please confirm your SOULMATE._

**_LEE TAE YONG (selected: LEE TAE YONG)_ **

 

_CONFIRM [x]   DENY [ ]_

 

_…_

 

_Test Result PASS._

_KIM DONG YOUNG, you may now begin your DECISIONAL SCREENING._

 

_In DECISIONAL SCREENING, you will be given an AI-crafted afterlife list of choices. Please read through carefully and select only one. To read a description, press and hold on one option. To select an option, drag to the result box._

 

_DOMESTIC SELECTION(S)_

_ > Remain in afterlife _

_ > Remain in overworld _

_ > Haunt _

 

_NEUTRAL SELECTION(S)_

_ > Rebirth as ANONYMOUS _

_ > Rebirth as KIM DONG YOUNG_

 

_ROMANTIC SELECTION(S)_

_Only available for SOULMATE._

_ > CREDIT SYSTEM A _

_ > CREDIT SYSTEM B _

_ > CREDIT SYSTEM C _

 

_ENDING SELECTION(S)_

_Only available for SOULMATE with WAITING SOULMATE._

**_> Eternity_ **

_Description: You will be eligible to spend an infinite amount of time with your SOULMATE in the afterlife._

 

_Please drag and confirm selection here:_

**_ENDING SELECTION (selected: Eternity)_ **

 

_CONFIRM [x]   DENY [ ]_

 

_…_

 

_Thank you for your patience. In a few moments, you will be sent to LOCATION: AFTERLIFE (external reference: LEE TAE YONG) through our recently updated transportation experience. Please wait one minute._

 

_How was your experience with Waiting Room today?_

_Excellent [x]_

_Good [ ]_

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_Thank you for your input today! Please enjoy our newest ETERNITY selection. We wish you the best life with your soulmate._

 

_We are now transporting you to LOCATION: AFTERLIFE (external reference: LEE TAE YONG). Please hold._

**Author's Note:**

> thank u to the dotae gc again !!
> 
> twitter @neovyong


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